More Today

The Boy and I were at a lovely wedding this summer. Our friends were married by the same priest that married us, in the same church. The Boy was the Best Man, and Fr. Joe took more than a few jabs at him in throughout the ceremony.

Our friend the priest did have something to say that day that has really stuck with me over the last few months (and it wasn’t about how the groom should really reconsider his friends).  He told the happy, crying, over-the-moon in love couple that he hoped their wedding day was the least happy day of their marriage.  He said in your marriage you should love each more today than yesterday, and a little bit more tomorrow.

 

I can’t say that I love the Boy more today than yesterday, or more than a week ago, or last month. But I do love him more than our wedding day. We are stronger today than we were then. We’ve been through some truly craptastic days in the last 3 years, and while I would happily trade many of them in, there is no one else I would have rather spent those days with.

 

We are a team. Happy as a team. Sad as a team. Successful as a team. Frustrated as a team. Elated as a team. Scared as a team. Some days he has to be the team captain, and some days it’s me. Through it all what keeps me the most steady and focused and optimistic as we face our toughest opponents is the knowledge that we’re in it together, and reading from the same page of the playbook.

 

Look at me with the sports analogy.  He must be rubbing off on me.

 

Happy Anniversary Buddy.

West Photo-1970

I thought I loved you then.
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Two Years

When the calls and conversations
Accidents and accusations
Messages and misperceptions
Paralyze my mind

Busses, cars, and airplanes leaving
Burning fumes of gasoline
And everyone is running
And I come to find a refuge in the

MeaghanDan_0374_Crop

Easy silence that you make for me
It’s okay when there’s nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay

Monkeys on the barricades
Are warning us to back away
They form commissions trying to find
The next one they can crucify

West Photo-2047

And anger plays on every station
Answers only make more questions
I need something to believe in
Breathe in sanctuary in the

Easy silence that you make for me
It’s okay when there’s nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay

Orange tie

Children lose their youth too soon
Watching war made us immune
And I’ve got all the world to lose
But I just want to hold on to the

Easy silence that you make for me
It’s okay when there’s nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me

Mr. And Mrs.

The easy silence that you make for me
It’s okay when there’s nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay

Easy Silence by the Dixie Chicks was the last song the Boy and I danced to on our wedding day.

Two years has flown by, and these words have never felt more true for us.

Happy Anniversary Buddy… I know whatever this year brings for us, we’ll take it on it together.

Love always.

Happy Anniversary

Happy Anniversary

Did you notice that the wedding posts (and all posts for that matter) fell off the planet? Yeah, me too.  What can I say… the summer’s been a little nutso.

But today’s the day. One year later. First anniversary.

“They” say the first year is the hardest. If that’s the case I can happily report the Boy and I are in for years of smooth sailing. I read a post the other day from Fumbling Towards Normalcy about fairy tales and happily ever after. It made me laugh. Shana always makes me laugh. But she opened this post reflecting on a friend’s status on her anniversary and I really couldn’t agree more.

For richer and poorer – check – (got a new job; bought a house)

In sickness and in health – check (only the odd man cold; for the most part we’re pretty healthy)

For better for worse – check and check.

Sure we’ve had an argument or too, but we also had a lot of fun. It feels different than when we were engaged or dating. And still any time the Boy refers to me as his wife it feels a little strange but it also makes me feel really loved.

But as I remember what we promised each other last year, it makes me remember how lucky we are. Lucky to have found each other. Lucky to have had such a perfect wedding day. Lucky to be supported and loved by so many people. Lucky to have such a happy life together.

Happy Anniversary Buddy. 1 year down, lifetime to go. 🙂

XOXO

Everyone needs a role model

Have you been watching the Olympics? It’s pretty impressive what all of these athletes can do with their bodies and their brains and while I’m not a sports person AT ALL, I’m all for kids and adults alike looking up to athletes. They work hard and if this YouTube video is any indication – they play hard too.

But I’m not here on a Sunday to talk about the Olympics or the validity of athletes as role models, or pop stars, authors, or anyone else for that matter.

Nope. This Sunday post is for Ginger Mom and Ginger Dad! Today is their 40th wedding anniversary. 40 years is a long freakin’ time and worthy of  a Sunday post at the very least.

My parents have a love story that, as they like to say, only works 40 years ago. “if you did what we did – we would worry. The world’s just not the same.” I don’t know about that – part of me thinks if Mom’s parents weren’t distracted by 9 other children they’d have been a little worried too!

Mom headed to Northern Ontario, (further North than we are now – I know it seems impossible) to mend a broken heart. She stayed with family and they introduced her to a bean pole ginger in thick black-rimmed glasses with huge, HUGE muttonchops. Who would have thought that would be just her type!

They spent the week or maybe 2 together that summer and then Mom headed back to civilization.

They chatted on the phone, and Dad met the family at Christmas. Imagine pulling up to a house with 9 kids arranged by height staring at you in the front window. He passed the test and they started talking about marriage.

Disappointed that they couldn’t get it together by Valentine’s Day, they took things slow and got married in August instead.

A year may not seem like a super short time to go from “my name is” to “I do” – but what about 6 weeks? Does that seem short? Because 6 weeks is all the time they spent together in the same city.

6 weeks.

6 weeks and then Mom left civilization and moved to Northern Ontario.

It seems to have worked out for them though since its forty years later and they’re still going strong.

Mom and Dad have been awesome role models for my siblings and me. They love each other and their family. The only fight I remember them having when we were kids was about cheese. I’m pretty sure it wasn’t about cheese but I remember thinking at the time – they never fight and they’re fighting about cheese? Weird.

They taught us to love our partners first. Speak to each other with kindness. Laugh a lot. And how to work in a true partnership.

Whenever The Boy is away for the weekend or we find we’re on opposite schedules, my Mom says “don’t worry that you’re spending a lot of time apart. It’s good for your marriage. You should both have your own lives.” Dad seems to agree – but then Dad always agrees (maybe that’s a secret to success too!)

The Boy and I might only be in our first year of marriage, and 40 seems like a long what away. But that’s the great thing about role models – they let you know what’s possible.

Congratulations on your 40th anniversary Mom and Dad!

XOXO

 

365 Days Down

This week is anniversary week for the Boy and I.  Today – 1 year since we officially moved in together.  While we rented our apartment for September 1st, we didn’t actually spend the night until the 20th.  In honour of this anniversary I’ll tell you a little story about the Boy (everyone’s favourite topic) and how even after 365 days of practice – we’re still working out some kinks in living together.

The Boy is now assistant coaching for the Men’s Volleyball team at Durham College.  He’s really happy to be doing it, but he’s also still finishing up his baseball season (playoffs or something) so he’s been out almost every night of the week.  I’m okay with it – it leaves me with a sports free television and my knitting (bliss).

Last week I came home from work and the Boy tells me we’re all out of bread.  I thank him for the tip and tell him to pick some up on his way home – he has the car after all.  Boy is not terribly excited about this plan and leaves shortly afterward for volleyball.

10:00 – the phone rings, it’s the Boy – we exchange pleasantries.

Boy – Did you make anything for dinner?

Me – Obviously yes.

Boy – What did you make?

Me – (thinking why does it matter it’s better than McDonald’s which is why you’re asking me) Fish with salsa, rice and broccoli.

Boy – Did you make enough for me?

Me – Obviously yes.

Boy – And for lunch tomorrow?

Me – This is not my first time.

Boy – Okay.  I’ll be home shortly.

Me – Are you stopping to pick up bread?

Boy – Oh.  I don’t really want to.

Me – Too bad. It’ll take 5 seconds just pick some up.  Metro is open 24 hours.

Boy – Okay. Bye.

Time passes.  I decide I’m going to go read in bed I had a headache and my lungs hurt (someone thought it would be a good idea to melt the kettle earlier that day leading to much smoke inhalation).

10:20 – I hear the Boy come in.  He has a grocery bag.  He comes in and asks why I’m in bed – I tell him.  He says something about not feeling that way if I hadn’t set the kitchen on fire (such a drama queen).

I hear the bag rustling.  I hear a container of cookies being opened. Silence.  I hear a bag of chips being opened. Chewing.

I laugh to myself at the Boy’s inability to go into a grocery store on his own without coming out with a bunch of crap.

I go to sleep.

Next morning – I go to the kitchen to make breakfast.  I stop in my tracks.  He picked up “bread” I guess… Dempsters.  There is over-processed, third ingredient is Sucrose/Fructose, twenty ingredients I can’t pronounce, never goes moldy, Dempters bread.  I’ll give him some credit – at least he got whole wheat.  But Dempters? We haven’t had Dempters in our house in the ENTIRE year we’ve been living together.  We don’t buy processed bread.  We buy bread from the bakery with as many seeds and grains in it as possible.  That is our compromise – between the German dark rye bread that the Boy doesn’t like at all and Wonder White.

Brutal.  Here’s the best part in my opinion – the cookies he bought, are from the bakery section.  Probably sitting right across from the bread we buy! Sure no preservatives in your COOKIES!  Make up for them in your BREAD! 

Then it hits me.  I start to wonder. Does he do these things on purpose?  Do you think boys go into the grocery store grumpy that they’ve been sent there, and think “how can I make sure she never sends me in here again?”  Sure I can see boys being that manipulative.  But my Boy?  No.  Surely not.  He clearly just temporarily lost his mind.

I go to work.

I come home and ask him what is with the bread. His response? “That’s the bread I like – if you don’t like it, don’t send me in to get bread.” 

Outrage!

Happy Anniversary Boy.  I thought we were making progress.  FYI I will be picking up more bread tonight and making breadcrumbs out of your sugar bread.

Picture from here

38 Years Deserves a Shout Out

Happy Anniversary to my WONDERFUL parents who have made 38 years of happy marriage look like a cake walk!

You guys have taught us valuable lessons as far as how to have a happy marriage.  So to celebrate your anniversary I would like to give my top 5 lessons about marriage you’ve given me over the years.

  1. Use your words – be polite and only use nice ones.
  2. Treat each other with respect – always
  3. Kiss hello and goodbye
  4. Say I love you – always
  5. Laugh at/with each other every day.

Thanks for being excellent role models and awesome parents!

Happy Anniversary!

Love you

XOXO

PS. Ottawa was bumped until tomorrow – showing the parentals some love is higher priority!